Beloved Master, lately I feel the need to die, I feel suffering, and it is this “me” that pops up every day telling me that cannot manage anymore to find a good reason.
But when I feel I am losing myself, a strong fear takes me over…But how is possible to feel love. Thank you from my Heart

First one must be clear that it is the “me” that is required to die, NOT the body.
If the body dies of course “me” dies too but what a waste of what might otherwise be a good life experience.
The message is for the “me” to die INTO Life, to lose itself utterly in the experience of the body/mind and dissolve.
Remember that the “me” is just a concept, a very strong one, that is a thought in the mind and nothing more.
As you say in order for this “me” to survive it needs reasons and purposes etc because without such things it cannot maintain the illusion of itself.
So Life now is asking you to live without reasons and purposes, in the losing of these a deeper peace will reveal itself.
The fear felt is the dying of this “me” concept so let it unfold, it will anyway without the permission of the “me” if it is time for this dissolution to take place.
Much Love to you

Avasa

01.06.2013

Hi Avasa,
Can you give me your opinion on my vision of the reality.
When I will have the gift of Enlightenment I will have anymore problems with sex and
I will have no problems with health and no problem with money or of any other sort.
This at times seems to be the message that comes to me, but what I feel true is that all can change or not at a “pratical” level but the only things that is changing is the seeing that you are not the body mind to which seem to happen “good things or bad things” that can be perceived and at the end to see that they are not problems but the play happening. If you can give me your opinion.

Hi,
It is not that the problems disappear but that the one who had them disappears. All is recognised to be in balance and so good and bad no longer are seen as opposites but rather more as dancing partners.
When there is clear seeing there is also acceptance and in that acceptance there is simply action that arises
without the mind dictating whether it is the right action of the wrong one, there is spontaneous action of the body/mind to the circumstances.
Much Love

Avasa

03.04.2013

If “i” cannot do anything but live spontanously, knwing that this will bring to bad consequences to my life, is anyway “right” doing it? Or is this just another trick of the mind to obtain what it wants?One could say that what is waiting for me is an unhappy destiny as much as the life that i am living?
I want to say that what i could do if i let go would not harm anyone but my ego, but this as a consequence would make suffer the people i love.
Thank u in advance

You would not have time to get worried if it appears suddenly and the mind does not sense it arriving.

You cannot do ANYTHING, this includes living spontaneously, LOL Because there is no you doing anything ever. Maybe a bad consequence would occur and maybe not, this is the mind trying to trap you into identification again. Notice how its stories are always about the future so you get attracted away from the moment.

I would say that actually living in spontaneity can bring only good. This anyway is not about what is right or wrong which is all conditional thinking, it is about what happens HAPPENING! there is no choice and no one to make such a thing. You are not living Life , Life is living you. It always has lived that body and it always will, the apparent you does not even come into the picture except as a thought form arising.

It may hurt others but only their ego can be hurt and as that is the very thing they pray for daily to be released from, why be concerned about their egos? People will go through what they have to go through and that is not your business, if they go through it they too will be released from the ego concept. You cannot protect anyone from themselves. This concern for others is not Love so dont be fooled it is taught conditional behaviour that carries with it a sense of duty.

Anyway if awakening is to take place it will do so and you have no say in it and if those around you react then that is the way it is and is supposed to be, all perfect.
Only egos get hurt, when there is the ability to say YES to life then where is the one that resists, where is the suffering?
You are correct this is the mind trying to trap you into identifying.

Much Love

Avasa

22.3.2013

I am still bottled up in the ego, this i can recognize. I cannot stop (and also there, who would stop to do what?… lets dro it immediatly). I know I am not the bdy/mind but as you see untill this is not seen it is just a menatl trick. in some particular moment i  found myself to feel such feelings of well being and peace never felt before where all other desire could not even have a reason to exist. In those moments happened just when I did not even think about them. Despite i am aware of ths fact, I cannot avoid but insisting in wanting to understand them to make them happen again. I always read your posts and what you say I feel it so close to me that I have the impression to be able to touch it for real, and then I am not able and this provockes in me a strong sense of impotence (and anger at times). Yet I am here, actually I AM NOT in this moment… and it seems Ihave no other choivce but it all happen. A big thank you

So If you are bottled in the ego the ego is separate from you is it not? This is the beginning of recognition.
That is a fact that you cannot drop because there is no you to do the dropping or anything else, the dropping will happen when it happens. The desire for this dropping is the prelude to it taking place and there is no one in charge of that desire either.

It is clear that the body/ mind is an object to this that sees it, what sees the object is always subjective to any object and as the subject it cannot be felt or seen or known in the way we talk about things, it requires a new way of seeing. The trick is coming from the mind as it tries to emulate what from time to time happens there when there is not intentional trying to see this. As you already know the trick does not do the trick does it? LOL

It is clear from your description of those moments that the seeking is not projecting something awaiting in the future that you see this from time to time, what is to be realised from this is that there really is nothing to be done to make those moments one eternal moment.
Yes the mind rests with what is in the moment then, no longer projecting other than what is.
So the desire to understand is arising, it is that way for some and that too is not in anyones control, it is simply happening.
Look at the situation ……. if you can touch it what or who would be doing the touching? It is like trying to kiss your own lips !

What is stated here is seen to be correct there because the mind is already taking time out and in those moments you are THIS, no more no less than it is here. These truly are your message to yourself LOL

Yeh I remember that anger and feeling of not being able to do anything about it, the frustration etc . It is all good stuff ….. when looked back at later LOL
Yes ! you are here ALWAYS, just here.

There is no choice because there is no one to have a choice.
It is a difficult place to be so in the words of Tony Parsons to Richard Silvester just before awakening happened,
” I HOPE YOU DIE SOON !”

With much Love

Avasa

__________________

These last few weeks I have spent time on ebay selling things from the house to empty it ready for a move to wherever existence is taking me and of course things appear that desire tells me I just HAVE to have LOL

Many times in the last moment someone pips me at the post and puts in a bid within one second after mine which is one penny more than my offer and so my MUST HAVE I do not get.
For sure at one time this would have carried with it a feeling that would not have been positive LOL
These days however it is just the way it is !

If I win it is the will of existence and if I lose it is also the same, a thank you arises with laughter.
If you can go to bed tonight accepting with the same attitude the fact that enlightenment did not take place today OR that it did take place then you are in the very best place. You can drop asleep with a thank you to the will of existence.

One thing is for sure that from the ego point of view it is damned if it does’nt take place and it is damned (totally) if it does LOL

Much Love

Avasa

19.3.2013

I agree what you say, in the sense that I know that what you say is part of your experience and is reale, but as much as I mae an effort, I have no idea of what you really want to say, because the form though which One is manifesting (in order words me) is not awakened, otherwise there would be any problem. I accept the fact that there is one Oneness that is manifesting through various forms, but to be able to speak about awakening maybe must be experimented from each various form, otherwise why on a certin point a particular form understand the Reality of what is and instead others keep on being outside of it? It must necessarily happen something in order for this to happen and if it happens for me and you remain in the sleeping, this Onness maybe is fragmented in itself and its complete awakening can happen only in the awakening of “all” forms, through which is manifesting itself. There is just One and this is seen just throughcertain forms, why not by all? Which is the difference between a form and another? The Love of Oneness is manifestiung through the single forms, what has been happening?, if all is already Enlightenment?

If you imagine you are the body/mind you have limited yourself to that way of seeing yourself.
In that way of seeing it appears as if there are many others in many other body/minds
The moment that you see what you actually are it is obvious that there are no others, all is yourself.
So from the point of view where you see yourself as the body/mind separation appears to be true
When one sees oneself without a location one is everything, everywhere, in all things.
This means that one was always the One but did not see this, nevertheless one was and always is this that is in and appearing as all.

In some forms the Self is not recognised because of identification with the body/mind and in some that identification is no longer present.
Which ever is the case it is happening always to the One. There is only the One.

Avasa

If i imagine to be the body/mind, then you can also imagine of not being it and in THAT CASE I would see Oneness. Then something MUST happen, and who would make it happen? If there is nobody there to do anything? ” When one sees oneself without a location..” WHO IS THE ONE THAT IS SEEING?  My mind (!) cannot do anything but to bow in front of such mystery…

The One that is seeing is not a WHO, there is still in what is said here the concept of someone seeing, there is no one, just seeing happening.
The body is SEEN, the mind is SEEN, but what is doing this seeing is neither the body nor the mind, it is nothing, emptiness.
Of course this is difficult to grasp intellectually, in fact it is impossible to be grasped, it has to be SEEN.
Yes of course you can (and do) imagine yourself to be the body/mind and you can also imagine you are not that but both of those are mind games, they are not seeing. In seeing there is no effort and no one doing it.
No one can make this happen because there is no one LOL I know it is frustrating when you really want to understand it and that is good because that frustration is needed, it is a requirement that brings about the giving up of imagining this can be done by the ego.
When awakening happens it happens, there is no one present to make it happen.
The eye blinks , it happens, it does not require that someone makes it happen.
What is being felt there is happening, if there was someone in control would they choose what is happening, I think not!
A hug

Avasa

15.3.2013

So is to love still a desire?

Love is always the background upon which things have their existence.
When the “ME” has dissolved and one is this background. and therefore all that it contains. there is no one to love or anyone to do the loving. Then Love is true, it is all the play of Love.
The love that is desire is the desire to again return to this Love that is all One.

Avasa

Sorry sweet master, but at the end, what is ACTUALLY, the ego?

if you are angry with somebody, you believe to be right, and him also and it is a neverending story… the ego is that stuff that is consuming you inside? that stuff that makes you feel offended, that makes you feel always right, or dumb, or many other things…? thank you, a kiss

Hi
You have half got the answer LOL
The ego is a thought that claims to be the producer of what has taken place through the body and claims to be the doer of that action.

When thinking occurs for instance it is followed by another thought which states that it has just thought what has just occurred, this is the thinker! an action! a verb NOT a noun.
BOTH are thoughts, thoughts are just actions arising through the body/mind.

Whether there is a thought present of there being someone who is right or there being someone who is wrong in a sense is irrelevent because the idea that it is produced by somebody is incorrect to begin with. If there is the belief ( which is itself a thought) that the thought is owned or produced by someone there will be accompanying feelings of someone being clever or stupid or the many other things as you say. Even these feelings belong to no one and are produced by no one !!!
Best way to understand this and SEE this is to realise that ego is NOT an entity but an activity.
Once it is seen that all thoughts and feelings are action only the concept of there being someone begins to dissolve, without help from an imaginary someone LOL

Your question is worth answering as fully as possible as once there is the clear seeing of the fact that there is no thinker or feeler (producer of the feelings) or doer of the actions of the form then the concept of there being a personal doer drops so feel free to requestion me on this if you feel the need to.

Buddha said ” there is DOING but no doer thereof”
What is SEEN here is in total agreement with that statement.
The whole of manifestation is action only, a constant creating happening.
Much love to you

Avasa

Today I was reading of the ‘ vacuity’ of the form and non form, and how is difficult to understand the concept of it. I did not get which kind of enquiry should be done.

Do not be so bothered about enquiry, it is simple.
You are not the body because it is an object that you SEE
You are also likewise not the mind because that too is objective.
What remains that is witnessing the appearance and disappearance of these two is what you are, very simply you are Awareness.

As awareness you can only be aware of yourself directly without any means or techniques etc
If attention is able to remain aware of this awareness all else will drop into place without effort and if attention is not able to do this it is simply not yet time for this to be steady, no effort will bring it about.

You are already Awareness, there is nothing to be added.
If there is a problem at all it is because it is too obvious and simple and the mind tries to DO it LOL

Avasa

What should I do, pratically, to stay with the sensations and let them be fully lived, should i listen only on a phisical level or should i feel them ” emotionaly” because emotionally i cannot feeel them i must think them!! Sorry but as u must haveunderstood i am a bit of a goofy about this subject …thank u.

We are all goofies trying to ungoofy ourselves
As a human experience we are made up of 3 parts essentially
1….. A bodily form
2….. A mind, which consist of feelings and thoughts
3….. This that is aware of them existing

If we look a little more closely at the mind we will see that thoughts arrive in consciousness AFTER feelings NOT before. Due to our conditioning and schooling we have been trained to miss the sensation and quickly jump to the story of the thoughts and this has led us to become separated from our world.

When we were very young we were FEELING beings NOT thinking beings and in that we were sensetive to our world as an extension of ourselves.

If you find the mental too much the answer is to withdraw the attention from it to what underlies it, the prior sensation, when one is able to do this easily then one becomes aware of the awareness prior to the sensations. One then begins to establish contact with this and at a certain moment one sees that this is actually what one is, NOT the body/mind but the eternal awareness prior to the sensations and the thoughts , and of course what is then obvious is that everyone is actually this One Awareness. This Awareness is ALWAYS ALREADY present as what is witnessing the mind and the body.

You are already this Awareness and this is the Truth. As this One you are the creator of the play of Life.

Do not hesitate to question everything and anything stated by anyone else to the point that it is YOUR truth.

Much Love

Avasa

The sound of silence…. Mine is a pulsating buzz…. How could be the sound of silence? It seems to be something external to me, and at the same time is inside of me… For sure I am aware of it, so it comes from Consciousness – Silence. What does this wanna say to me? That I am that sound?

When one first becomes aware of it yes it is as you describe, if the attention remains on it then it becomes more clear that it is in fact the SOUND of silence and NOT the silence itself.
This buzz is the first vibration that arises from the stillness of the true silence, this is the Aum and all other vibrations that appear as our experience of Life are variations of this initial vibration that then vibrates above and below itself to appear as all that the senses experience. It is all One.

It SEEMS to be external because there is the idea that there is an inside that is separate from an imagined outside.
Yet , as you say, also inside of you.
In fact it IS inside of you because in Truth you are the Whole and all that is experienced is being experienced INSIDE of you, you yourself are the non-experience within which everything is happening.

No! Not that you are the sound but THIS silence that hears the sound that it is creating
The sound is like an index finger pointing to the silence
Object to subject.
The object can and does disappear but the silence NEVER:
You are eternal

Avasa